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Tuesday, February 28, 2006 1 cm makes a lot of difference. But it's okay!That bastard is really fuck up. He should just go and die. I can't wait to get over this. get over this fuck up bastard. I shall laugh at his oh-so-holy attitude, I shall agrees with all the ppl out there that he is cocky, he is lazy, he thought he knows everything, I shall join them in mocking at him. I shall just believe that he is infamous, he is faking everywhere he goes, he puts on the mr-nice-guy mask, he sucks, he is being rank one of the top few sucky guys in scdf, he puts amen at the end of every lie he said and after he sin and then hope that ppl forgives him. He is hopeless. A hopeless bastard who thought that the world revolves only around him, who feels so insecure that he needs attention to make him feel useful and needed. He is simply hopeless. Don't ever want to see him again. I shall go away, for my own good. Oh... let me have the never-look-back attitude! Amen. Saturday, February 18, 2006 I am sitting at backroom with nothing much to do.. The workload during weekday seems more sia, but anyway, I only come in here on Thursday, Friday and Saturday.Am being force to go on leave for 4 days next week. Aiya, like that means that when I really gotta go on leave, I'll have problem. A bit sick what they are doing. Feel like looking for another job. You may say that I wanted to run away from some people, but that is the truth. Haha... Another way of putting it is running away from reality. Coz reality sucks, so I must avoid. Lies are lies. No matter how the words are being twists or whatever, they are just a pack of lies. The feelings are weird, I can't put them in words. Only my heart knows how it feels like. I guess that is part of growing up, an experience that one will get along the way... I do really learn from it. It teaches me a harsh lesson, and maybe that is what I really need. I am still confuse at how he lied with eyes open and telling me that he never tells lie.. The way he looks when he is lying, I'll never forget. He stares hard like he is an innocent boy hoping for someone to understand and believe him. He is a package of lies and shit. Oh God... Is this the way you teach your 'belove son'? I really doubt if he learns anything from you. Open the eyes of the gf tho. After all the craps I tok, I'll still end up in the car listening to amazing lies. Wooo... That's really madness. The bottom line is that I had never met anyone worse that him. I hope he would be the last one coz I dun wanna meet ANYBODY ELSE! THEREFORE, MAY ALL OF YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE FOR THE TIME BEING AND STOP PESTERING ME! Friday, February 17, 2006 I feel like shit these days...The most messed up v-day I ever had... And the aftermath is worse... People forcing me to say things i don't want, doing all sorts of things to make me cry, breaking my heart like it nothing. I wonder what is happening... I feel so tired and numb. Adrian's making me numb. Yes, I feel numb all of a sudden. It's like history repeating itself and yet this is worse. Everybody told me he is a bastard, I know that perfectly well. But tell me how am I suppose to accept all this out of the blue... I cant bring myself to leave him... I need time... I feel the way he is tryin to deny, the way he is tryin to play with my feelings, the way he is tryin to shake off certain things... I allowed all that to happen... Itz my fault.. I am stupid... I hate it... I dun like it.. I feel like a fool.. Everybody just leave me alone! Fuck off and back off.. LEAVE ME ALONE YOU JERKS! Yes, I am as mess up as this entry is... this is madness... I hate them... Adrian, the jerk, had never been in my life. Nothing ever happened between us. The rest just get out of my life as well. Just leave me alone. Go away. Time to wake up. Saturday, February 11, 2006 Isn't it great... When someone appears in your monotone life... He makes you smile from the bottom of your heart, you look forward to see him everyday after work, and even the most irritating person seems like the best person on earth suddenly..He's too pretty not to be notice, too pretty to be ignore.. He seems like the perfect one... For that moment... Before the truth is being throw right in front of you. It hurts like hell. It hurts like before with a bit of numbness... I don't want to go through that heartaching period ever again... I don't want to read all those heartbreaking words in front of me ever again... But I have no idea how to stop all that now.. I feel so lost again.. It's worse than before... He never lie, he only twists his words all the time.. That is more than enough.. I don't want to be a extra burden to him at this point of time when everything is not going well for him, but itz making me crazy.. I am lost... It hurts me deep. |
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I believe - The past is not for us to dwell on. Move on when it's time, for not anyone, but yourself. Eyes make me blind - Myself Simple girlie, 21 going 22, Gemini likes... Friends, DancingToMyBeat, RetrO, Chcolate, Lavender, FreedOm, Truth, PurpLe, HugoBoss, TheatreArts, VirginSuicides, Reading wishes for... Nothing much. I just want to be happy. hugo boss">hugo boss">hugo boss">Hugo Bosss [Deep Red], student card of NAFA archives February 2005 Other People ---- links my pixies!
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